Dear Grandson
By J. P. Jones

Dear Grandson:

I have become a little older since I saw you last, and a few changes have come into my life since then. Frankly, I have become a frivolous old gal. I am seeing five gentlemen everyday. As soon as I wake up, Will Power helps me get out of bed. Then I go to see John. Then Charlie Horse comes along, and when he is here he takes a lot of my time and attention. When he leases, Arthur Ritis shows up and stays the rest of the day. He doesn’t like to stay in one place very long, so he takes me from joint to joint. After such a busy day, I’m really tired and glad to go to bed, Ben Gay tuckes me in. What a life. Oh yes, I’m also flirting with Al Zymer.

Love,
Grandma

P.S. The preacher came to call the other day. He said at my age I should be thinking of the hereafter. I told him, “Oh I do it all the time. No matter where I am, in the parlor, upstairs, in the kitchen, or down in the basement, I ask myself, “Now, what am I here after?”

This article “Dear Grandson” written by J. P. Jones is excerpted from Big Book Of Church Humor 2003.