THE MINISTER AND HIS FAMILY
BY PASTOR CHARLES R. GRISHAM
REFLECTIONS ABOUT THE PAST
What is it that causes us to do what we do or to choose the path that we follow? As we look back over our past we begin to see a pattern develop that answers most of these questions.
Now that I have been in the ministry over the course of many years, I can see many contributing factors. God has certainly been good to me and my family.
It was such a privilege to be raised in a strong Apostolic church Pastored by Rev. and Mrs. C. P. Williams in Tulsa, Oklahoma. They were strong believers in the oneness doctrine; missions, holiness and the spirit-led life.
My Pastor was like a redwood in the forest. His staunch stand for right although often misunderstood would prove to be one of the major reference points in my life. He made us to believe it took something to be saved and commanded respect from all who would follow.
Sis. Mary Williams, my Pastor’s wife, proved to be one of the greatest sources of challenge and inspiration to me. She was the greatest teacher I have ever heard and also the most gifted preacher in conveying the message of Christ’s love.
Inasmuch as our church was a Bible School church we had the privilege of knowing many wonderful people of God. This had such an impact on everyone.
I was challenged as a young person I thought if I was ever a preacher I would like to be staunch and determined like my Pastor, C. P. Williams; enthusiastic like Bro. Mark Baughman and able to make people desire to know Jesus like Sis. Mary Williams, my Pastor’s wife. She really made the Christian life look great.
As life unfolded, I could sense how important the influence of others really is. My own mother, Fern Grisham always made me feel that God would use me if I would follow Him. She also taught me to have confidence in myself Her godly life and consistency set the pace.
Then I can honestly say as a minister that I would have been totally incapable of accomplishing anything were it not for my precious wife Frances and our family.
God has led us through many painful experiences along with countless victories.
My wife and family had to believe I was called of God in order to follow along and support every effort. They too became an integral part of it.
So as you consider the wisdom of this writing I hope you can see the pattern of God’s blessings and be challenged to greater things in God.
MY PHILOSOPHY OF LIFE
In the Lord’s Prayer we remember the gentle and feeling phrase “Give us this day…” What a statement and petition! Who does the “us” of this petition involve?
Someone once stated “the problem with life is that it is so daily. ” In other words you can’t rush it but you must take it one day at a
time. We can’t skip over a day, nor can we go back and live any day over.
Once it has come and gone, it’s history. Therefore, it is so important to make each day count. With this in mind I would like to detail my philosophy in this manner as a pattern for each day. First of all I try to touch God every day. In some way; through prayer, meditation, and reading His word I, want to be sure I touch Him.
Secondly, I try to touch a project every day that will outlive me. It may be a tract, a poem, a lesson or booklet; a sermon, Bible-study, etc. I want to be sure if this is the last day, I want something to be left behind that will be paying off throughout the ceaseless ages of eternity.
Then, thirdly, I try to touch people every day. A minister needs to be a people-person. We are called to minister to people and not simply to preach sermons. This has led me to give myself to becoming an “encourager.” It has been my joy to write from five to twenty letters per day for many years. There is tremendous power in communication.
So as you read this simple booklet, remember the power that you possess as you touch God, touch projects that will outlive you, and touch people who will further expand your goals, dreams and vision.
BACKGROUND OF THE AUTHOR
Rev. Charles R. Grisham is presently serving as Pastor of the New Life Apostolic Church in Detroit, Michigan. He has served this church since 1975 after leaving the General Home Missions Division of the United Pentecostal Church at the World Evangelism Center in Hazelwood, Missouri.
Bro. Grisham was married to his wife Frances on October 16, 1948. They have six children, and 10 grandchildren.
Bro. Grisham was called to the ministry during the middle ’50’s and has served in various capacities over the years in the church as well as the business world. These experiences include time served as Pastor, Evangelist, assistant to the Pastor, Associate Pastor and pioneer missionary in the Great Plains development program of the United Pentecostal Church International establishing a church in Fargo, North Dakota.
In this endeavor working with J. H. Yohe the district grew from seven churches to thirty three churches in less than five years.
Bro. Grisham has also served as a member of the Executive Board of the U. P. C. I. as well as presbyter on the district board in the Michigan District of the U. P. C. I. In addition, he has served on various boards and committees including the Quest, Global Conquest, Youth Redemption, Radio Commission and the Evangelism Commission.
Listed below you will find a summary of the church oriented experience and also the business oriented experience.
Biographical Summary
Church-oriented experience under a Pastor:
Sunday School teacher, various classes Youth Leader
Sunday School Superintendent
Boy Scout Master
Deacon
Elder
Assistant to the Pastor, First Apostolic
Church, Tulsa Oklahoma
Associate Pastor, First Apostolic Church,
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Radio Ministry – Apostolic Gospel
Broadcast
Associate Pastor, Evangelistic Temple,
Hammond, Indiana
Continued Church-oriented experience
Pastor – First Apostolic Church, Fargo, North Dakota
Pastor – Apostolic Church, Detroit, Michigan
Evangelist
Radio Ministry – World Outreach
Broadcast
Editor World Outreach Publication
Producer of several record albums
Editor of Torch of Truth Publication
Pioneer Evangelism and Pastoring in Home Missions field – Fargo,
North Dakota
Secretary/Treasurer of the Great Plains Development Program,
U. P. C. I. (North Dakota, South Dakota, Nebraska)
Member Publicity Committee, National Youth Redemption Center,
U. P. C. I.
Member Endtime Revival Committee, Home Mission division U. P.
C. I. • Member Radio (Harvestime) Commission U. P. C. I.
Member Evangelism Commission (Home Missions Division) U. P. C.
I.
Outreach Director, Home Missions Division, U. P. C. I.
Editor Outreach magazine – Home Missions division U. P. C. I.
Writer, poet, author of many papers, seminars, booklets, and
study courses • Conference speaker
Camp meeting speaker (evangelist and teacher)
Guest lecturer at various Bible Colleges
Developed and conducted many seminars and retreats on Family
life, Evangelism, Leadership for both the laity and the ministry
Member Educational Committee Apostolic Institute of Development,
Michigan District of the U. P. C. I.
Member Michigan District Board, U. P. C. I.
Member Michigan Vision – Plan of Evangelism
Member Steering Commission Global Conquest U. P. C. 1.
Executive Presbyter, North Central Region of the U. P. C. I.
Business-oriented experience
Founder of several companies in the field of Design, Engineering,
Marketing, advertising, land development and electronics
President of the Inventors Congress; Industrial Commission of the
State of Oklahoma
Member Engineers Society, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Member of Jr. Chamber of Commerce, Kiwanis, American Rifle
Association
Vice President Oklahoma Republican Minutemen
Lectured in “Trip to Truth” seminar in the field of personal
motivation and leadership
THE MAN IN THE GLASS
When you get what you want in your struggle for self,
And the world makes you king for a day,
Just go to a mirror and look at yourself,
And see what THAT man has to say.
For it isn’t your father or mother or wife,
Whose judgment upon you must pass,
The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the one staring back from the glass.
Some people might think you’re a straight-shootin’ chum,
And call you a wonderful guy,
But the man in the glass says you’re only a bum,
If you can’t look him straight in the eye.
He’s the fellow to please, never mind all the rest,
For he’s with you clear up to the end.
And you’ve passed your most dangerous, difficult test,
If the guy in the glass is your friend.
You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And get pats on the back as you pass.
But your final reward will be heartaches and tears
If you’ve cheated the man in the glass.
author unknown
THE MINISTER AND HIS FAMILY
The Minister’s Call
Something takes place in every ministers’ life that he can look back to and say: “That’s when I knew for sure.’ The call of God brings some men from far away and obscure backgrounds while others are called from within the house of a parent who is a minister.
While the qualifying and contributing factors may be as varied as the colors in a rainbow, still God conscripts those to whom He gives the charge and commission according to His Will.
Some will say they heard the Voice of God and others will report that God continually prompted them in a subtle yet definite way- They simply followed Him in the menial tasks that were signs of their discipleship.
In most cases God leads His man a step at a time until He orders the steps for him that will confirm the call to become a true minister of the Gospel.
When we look back with hindsight it becomes clear how God has been there, leading, guiding, directing, and preparing us. Through the good times and bad times He allows us to be proven and tested sufficient to establish our relationship.
One of the awesome things abut God’s ability is His omniscience. He sees and knows even before it happens. In His foreknowledge He knows who we will marry and what we will do for Him.
As he reveals His plan to us through His Word we begin to work with Him. As most construction projects involve a model or prototype, so the family is in relationship to the church. What better opportunity does a minister of the Gospel have to demonstrate the church to the world then through his family?
God is continually instructing us through the scripture in the clearest of terms. He defines authority and submission in practical ways that are easily understood. He describes love and commitment and uses His own life as the pattern. He so beautifully promises the benefits of training our children properly and on various occasions He cautions those who fail to provide for their family.
All of this is in the context of providing a good example to the world even down to the basic behavior of the elders.
A brief glance at a few basic scriptures will set the mental framework for our understanding. ‘Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;” (Ephesians 5:25)
“Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life: that your prayers be not hindered.” (I Peter 3:7)
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6)
“But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.” (I Timothy 5:8)
“Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honour, especially they who labour in the word and doctrine.” (I Timothy 5:17)
It becomes very obvious that we are building a family working with God that He may use us to His glory that others might believe on Him.
Often times a minister will become confused as to which comes first: (1) His God, (2) His family, (3) His ministry, or (4) His world. It is for this reason that the minister’s call be confirmed by spiritual leadership.
A brief survey of scripture will help us to determine where our priorities should be. A man that is called of God must have a personal relationship with God. His family compliments and affirms that relationship.
The minister is called upon to minister in the pulpit and counsel those under his care. The lives of his family can confirm or annul his effectiveness.
The minister and his family are the first examples of his ability and qualifications as a discipler of others. He must start at home,
discipling them to Biblical order.
The man of God who has properly discipled his own family can then more effectively involve his family in reaching out to his world.
ASSURANCE OF THE CALL
There must be an absolute assurance of the Call of God. This is a basic requirement for the well-being of the family. God calls the man with the foreknowledge of his mate, talents and personality. Therefore a minister needs to be assured that he is called.
He needs also to know where he is called to labor. Uncertainty and indecision frustrates the wife and causes great unrest among the children.
There are many who have such a desire to work for God and apparently move too quickly into the ministry before being properly prepared.
The Apostle Paul warned: “Lay hands suddenly on no man…” (I Timothy 5:22)
There are many disappointments in the work of God and the best of us are challenged to the very limit. For this reason we see great merit in working with or under the guidance of an older or more seasoned minister for a period of time in a balanced development. There are numerous examples of those who were 30 years of age before going into an active ministry.
The apparent glamour in the eyes of the aspiring minister is very often just a mirage. This points out the need for a man to be called by God. There are those who feel pressured into the ministry by a relative, friend, or their mate, only to find they moved to quickly.
Those who have pioneered works can report many perils such as those experienced in the early church, (II Corinthians 11:26-28). While not the same, there are perils in our day as well.
It is imperative that one so called of God experience intimate communion with Him. This is a pre-requisite before we can serve Him in the ministry. Paul stated; “He that is joined to the Lord is one spirit.” (I Corinthians 6:17)
The minister’s wife and family must know him as a man of God before they can follow and respect him. All of this pinpoints the need for spiritual leaders who will instruct and counsel before sending one forth. (Romans 10:14)
REVIVAL PRAYER
Oh cleansing fire burn in me,
Purge My Soul and set me free,
Remove each stain of sinfulness,
That I may in Thy presence rest.
Cast far away my vain desires,
Refresh my Soul in revival fires,
Come again thy wonders reveal,
Oh bless me now is my appeal.
Prepare each heart to look above,
A world that’s lost and void of love,
Give us a burden, a vision too,
0h how we long to be with You.
What joy awaits the faithful ones,
The Master’s smile, the words “well done,”
A crown of life, a race complete,
What bliss awaits at His dear feet.
by Charles Grisham
WHAT IS MY MINISTRY?
There seems to be a great lack of understanding in what the ministry is on an individual basis. There are many who feel that it is simply an ability to stir people emotionally. It is much more than emotion.
Some obviously possess more of what it takes to stir emotions than others. Certain ones seem to minister with more annointing than others but what is the criteria for our observation?
Inasmuch as it is God who places us in the ministry we should be careful not to measure ourselves among ourselves. Far too many only think of the ministry as it relates to the pulpit experience. The late Bro. VA. Guidroz once stated; “the shallowest part of a man’s ministry is what we see in the pulpit.”
We must know whether or not we are called to help in the local church under a pastor; church establishment, evangelism, Bible teaching, etc.. A person can bring great confusion to a local church by acknowledging a call and then not understanding where or how he is to minister.
This weighs so heavily upon the wife and family as it is so easy to mis-read our circumstances. We can begin to feel that God has let us down, that other ministers have failed us. It is here that many experience wounded egos due to their situation.
With no doors opening it is so easy to develop a bad attitude that will lead to even fewer opportunities.
ESTABLISHING OUR PRIORITIES
We must establish our priorities so that our family and others may clearly see true Biblical perspectives. Which comes first?
There is so much confusion as to what comes first; (1) Ministry to the Lord, (2) Ministry to the family, (3) Ministry the church, or, (4) Minister to those outside the church.
As we examine the scripture we should easily conclude that everyone needs to minister to the Lord. Many scriptural passages affirm this principle; Ezekiel 44:15-16; Ezekiel 28:1; I Samuel 2:18; Luke 17:7-10; Luke 24:53 with Acts I and 2; Luke 10: 38-42 and Acts 13:1-4. Every person needs to minister to the Lord until others may see the touch of God upon us.
Then as this relationship begins to build we can greatly affect our families by ministering to them of this power from on high. They will be greatly affected as the man loves and gives as Paul instructed in Ephesians 5:20-33. As he trains the children as the wise Solomon stated in Proverbs 22:1-6, and establishes order in the family as recorded in Ephesians 6:1-4, true ministry to the family will reap many benefits now and eternally.
As the husband ministers to the wife as her head; the wife submits and ministers to the husband. The children then minister to their parents, and they, altogether, minister to the Lord. However, it should be obvious that the husband is the pace-setter.
After we have (1) established the pattern of daily ministering to the Lord in prayerful devotion and Bible-reading, (2) followed through with love and service by ministering to the family and its every need, then we are (3) prepared to effectively minister to the church family, the house of God.
There must be clarity of purpose in order to minister to the church (the House of God). The man of God needs the support, strength, and understanding of his family as he carries the burden of the flock of God and continues to lead his own household. God gives many words of instruction in I Corinthians, chapter 11-14; also specifically in I Peter 4:10; ‘As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.”
In the Old Testament scriptures, there was a need to change garments before going before the people. In this respect it is imperative that the ministry change garments as he performs his varied functions. He must not take the frustrations from home to the church and likewise, must not take the heartaches of the church home to impose them upon the peace of his family. The church is the church and the home is the home. You cannot homogenize the two.
After the minister has clearly established his ministry to the Lord, the family, and the church, it will be much easier (4) to minister to those outside the church who are in the world, preaching the Gospel, teaching, and witnessing as prophesied and commanded in Joel 3:9-10; 3:13-14; Matthew 28: 19-20; Mark 16:15-20; and Acts 2:38.
Everything will work more effectively for the minister and his family who have a clear understanding of their priorities and place in God’s work.
FINDING OUR PLACE
After a family feels comfortable in following the leadership of their minister leader, they will see where they fit in more clearly. The wife becomes a co-worker as a help meet; the children become co-workers and helpers; then the whole family are truly ‘workers together with God.” This is the will of God for the minister’s family.
Let us consider the minister’s family as a unit compared to that of others. Most lay people have three basic parts to their lives; the
church, their job, and their home. Their spiritual direction comes from the church; their financial needs are met through their job, and their basic relationships are built around the home. For instance; if a man has a problem at work, his home and church can pull him through. Obviously a serious problem may arise when any two of these areas develop problems at the same time.
However a minister in full-time service of God finds all three of these so closely associated it becomes difficult to separate them when problems arise. Therefore he finds it difficult to keep negative influences in their basic realm.
Perhaps the minister and his family are more vulnerable than others since the home, the church, and the employment are so closely tied together. There seems to be no escape when problems arise. We must stay close to God lest the smallest problem affect the stability of our whole world.
THE MINISTER’S WIFE
The minister’s wife has the same basic needs as any other wife plus even more. Paul Harvey has reportedly said, “The minister’s wife has the most difficult job in all the world.”
In the busy life of her husband it is so difficult for her to see how and where she fits into the scheme of things. When the husband is also her pastor, it makes it even more difficult for her needs to be met.
She needs to see in her husband the stability and direction of a spiritual leader who is firm in his convictions and holiness in his
life-style. The wife also needs to experience leadership in love. She needs to know that she, as a “co-worker in the ministry” is meeting the needs of her husband that no other woman can meet.
The wife needs to see and hear that you as her husband/minister delight in her as a person and that you understand her in the areas of her limitations. It might be well to point out that she doesn’t need to bear the whole load of the church.
She needs to know that you enjoy setting aside time for intimate conversation with her. She must know that you are aware of her presence even when your mind is on other matters. Ministers are always so preoccupied and it appears they always have time for others. She needs to know that you as her husband and minister are making investments in her life that will expand and fulfill her world.
It is so essential that both the husband and the wife be united in the call of God. We are often staggered at the number of ministerial families who experience deep personal problems in this area. One of the greatest pressures is that of worry about finances.
My Wife
Dear, I wish I could express
How you brought joy, and happiness
Into a dark, and saddened heart
And gave my life a brand-new start.
It seems the Master far above
Has sent you here for me to love.
You’ve made my world Oh so much brighter
And every extra burden lighter.
Your eyes, your lips, and tender kiss
Bring to me such heavenly bliss.
The tender words you speak to me
Send my heart a-leap with glee.
To know that you have promised me
That forever you will be
Always constant by my side
Faithful ever, we abide.
Darling, can’t you plainly see
That only you were meant for me,
Placed on earth in form of life
To be my faithful, loving wife!
– Charles R. Grisham
THE HUSBAND AND HIS NEEDS
The one individual that holds the key to the success or failure of a minister is his wife. She must be aware of what he needs to receive from her. As she displays a quiet spirit it will demonstrate that she is content with the providential leading of God in his life.
She should always display an appreciative spirit, showing gratitude to God and for her husband. Another powerful quality is the servant spirit, realizing that your service to God also includes being submissive to your husband in all things. Also a reverent spirit can bring such depth to a marriage when a wife takes delight and shows admiration for her husband and his ministry.
THE WIFE AND HER NEEDS
Most women are very basic in what they expect from their husband. Obviously the first thing that a minister must provide for his family is security. This is a must! It includes many things such as food, shelter, clothing, spiritual guidance for the family, discipline, and family order.
There must be time for intimate communication, a time for personal expression, loving concern, sharing together, and showing the deep feeling for your wife that only you can do. A balanced life must include time for the wife and communication must be a high priority.
Then it would be well to remember the need to show sincere appreciation for everything. Take care to notice little things, giving honor and expressing thanks for meals and a neat home. Make certain that you always recognize her extra work and care when waiting on guests.
The minister must never ignore the fact that his wife needs his affection. She needs to enjoy the tender expressions and romance that makes for a stable relationship. There must be closeness in their daily life as God directs the affairs of their ministry.
The husband must be the leader but he should never ignore the help and input of his wife. Every decision he makes will ultimately involve her. Therefore it only makes good sense to work closely together so that many frustrations and conflicts can be eliminated. Many ministers would be far more effective if they would involve their wife more in their ministry.
THE CHILDREN AND THE HOME
It is an absolute necessity that families do as much as possible together for they function as a unit, while each one has their specific place and function.
As the children come and mature through the various stages there must be order and discipline. The well-ordered life should include eating together, prayer together, and devotions.
The problems of the church should never be discussed at the table. Make this a time of fellowship and enjoyment. There is a need for balance in everything we do. Keep in mind that God knew that you would have a family and He would never violate the basic principles of scripture so you could fulfill a ministerial call.
The minister is not only a leader at church; he must also take the initiative to lead at home. Remember, today’s experiences become tomorrow’s memories. For this reason there must be adventure, excitement, and fun for everyone.
We must take care that we do not become so spiritual that we ignore the basic needs of each member of the family. The most effective ministers have found the happy balance and resultingly have more effect upon their children for the work of God.
If we ever send the signal to our family that God made us preach, they will very likely resent the fact that you are a minister. We should continually present the call of God to everyone as a special privilege that we are still awed by.
A minister should regularly tell those to whom he ministers how much he loves his wife and children. He should always speak respectfully of parents, other ministers, and leadership. We reap what we sow! As we sow righteousness and respect we can expect to receive a like response from our family, church, and friends.
A minister should never impose the undue pressure of ‘extreme perfection” on his children because they are “P-K’s”. Remember, they didn’t ask for that extra burden. Make them see their added blessings rather than the few difficulties.
Make time for your family. Take them places. Have fun and laugh. Relax and show them how a normal home should be. Some refer to giving “quality time’, but that seems almost like a business appointment. They just want time. They want your undivided attention.
Every minister has his own set of circumstances and story to tell, but as you look back it is amazing how your valleys now look like mountains that God helped you climb together.
Many of our battles condition us for our victories. How could we effectively minister to others if we didn’t have any difficulties? As
our children see how we react in the tough times, they rally to assist us in every way. Also, when the wife sees that this is really a
calling and not a basic desire, she too will rally and willingly lend her support.
I will never forget how vital my wife and children were when we were pioneering the work in North Dakota in the late ’60’s. There was no church of our kind for approximately 200 miles, no jobs at the beginning, and everything seemed a bit rough, but we and the other missionaries literally felt like we were living in the book of Acts.
There was a constant need for togetherness. Every one of our children found something to contribute. Simple jobs; part-time or whatever. My wife made peanut brittle to sell at business establishments, etc.
The wages that I was able to make were far less than what I could have made in other places, but we knew we were called there.
Neither time nor space would permit me to list all the names of ministers and friends who helped, called or sent workers. God was
faithful and our children were eye-witnesses to the faithfulness of God. So as you see, the call of God need not be looked upon as a hardship upon the children. It can be the making of them.
The work, no matter how meager it may have been, could not have been accomplished without my faithful wife who shared my dreams and also felt the burden. Each one of our children found their place of service as their talents were so needed.
REASONS FOR PROBLEMS
With all the demands we face in the family and church, it is so important that we stay close to God and not allow anything to endanger our walk with Him.
Even though we are called by God, we must remember that we are still flesh. Time and experience prove to us that there is little if
any difference in saved or unsaved flesh.
Selfishness has destroyed many marriages. Always allow your wife and family a place in your life and ministry. Do not deprive them of the right to serve and submit.
Guard against adolescent reflections. Be careful lest those flash backs destroy your family relationship. There is no age limit on immaturity and we must all “grow up”.
Be especially careful when children are born. Be sure to remember each other. Don’t allow the temporary loss of affection to create a gap that will ultimately divide you in purpose. When a woman bears a child she needs a little time to get spirit, soul, and body back on the same wave-link.
Another area that must be attended is the matter of masculinity and femininity. Men are to be men and women to be women. Feminine traits in a man and masculine traits in a woman can greatly hinder a minister’s effectiveness.
There is an ever present need for a minister to be busy since laziness and idleness can destroy the effectiveness of a minister. You must be busy planning, organizing, and following through on your plans. People will follow you if you know where you are going. Remember, it has been said, “An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.”
One point of major concern is that of overindulgence and gluttony. We must be temperate in all things. We should remember how the world looks at us as living epistles. If we do not take care of ourselves we may lack in energy to carry out our work.
We dare not forget also to remember the neatness of our personal appearance and home.
Inasmuch as we are always being observed by the church and community let us take care to be well kept. A clean and neat appearance and a well-maintained home is a powerful witness that must be remembered.
PITFALLS OF THE MINISTRY
There are many things that must be remembered, but there are a few timeworn pitfalls to the ministry. We have heard them repeatedly from our elders and leaders. My own Pastor drilled this into our thoughts continuously.
One of the major reasons for failures in the ministry is women. Every minister should mark well the risks involved in becoming too close to women on any level of activity. One of the greatest dangers is counselling women alone. It is well to let it be known that you do not do this and would like to have your wife with you or close-by. It may seem absurd to some but it is your ministry and you have a right to protect it. This will also create trust in you from your wife and others who know you.
This principle also applies in making “risky visits” to women’s homes when their husband isn’t home. Once you set a standard it will make it easier to live by it.
Take special precaution in behavior that borders on flattery. That can be dangerous. Well-intentioned compliments can lay the ground work for temptation either by you or by the other person. Keep in mind that you cannot trust the devil. You must also rule out trusting your flesh, Others are watching and they will read things into your behavior that may or may not be true.
One of the biggest pitfalls is money. We are to be good stewards over every penny God entrusts us with. We are to live if possible from the tithe, It is also imperative that we not become en. tangled with the world’s money.
Let us always keep in mind that every penny we receive comes largely from the labors of faithful saints. Many of them make great sacrifices and we should live in a manner that speaks of simplicity rather than extravagance. That is the least we can do. It will eliminate much criticism.
Then as we conclude, let us not forget the pitfall of false doctrine. We have been called out of the world and sanctified to fulfill our
calling. We live in a day when many have departed from the faith and have turned aside to gross error.
If we want our families and saints to remain true we must take special care not to mix or fellowship with those who twist, taint, or divert our minds from the truth. If we do so we may pay dearly.
If we need to counsel with someone about a question or a problem it should only be with proven men of God who are firm in doctrine and committed to the truth. There are always dangers when we take the risks of counselling with those who could through cunning craftiness turn us away from the right doctrine. Know those that you counsel with for you do not want someone filling in the blanks for you concerning you questions.
The new birth is still the same. Holiness is still a must and separation from the world is the right path.
As a minister we are curious by nature and it is so tempting to try every new idea that comes down the pike. If we fail to stay close to God we may experiment with some unproven idea or method that will twist or bend the proven.
Let’s stay abreast of what God is doing but always checking our reference points to see if we are still on the right path. God’s word
and God’s minister will confirm it by the Holy Ghost.
Let us agree together to protect our families.
We are responsible!
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